Fresh Start

I am so happy and grateful to tell you that I am feeling very well right now. This year has already brought so many beautiful twists and moments of joy. Still, I am getting angry sometimes and want to punch some people in the face - but Namaste. I am in control of my feelings. I feel emotionally stable. My break of the year is over and I am working again. And I never thought that it could feel so good to be back in the office. Because I changed the way how I look at life. I see blessings around every corner. I can sense that everything is truly happening for a special reason. I already celebrated my 26th round around the sun at the beginning of this year. How can we stay the same when our whole metabolism is readjusting every 7 years? I feel pretty close to that gateway tho. Something deep within the collective consciousness is changing. And I am here. Sitting at my desk in my own apartment texting about my life. As always. And I really really needed this fresh start. I reconnected to myself. And to the nature of it all. 

Words are beautiful but actions take courage. Lately I've been really really emotional. So many things changed in the last few years. So many mistakes turned into experience. So many failures seemed to be following me for the rest of my life. But when you change your perception everything changes. The way we look at things and the way we look at our own lives is the way we live. I am reading a pretty nice book at the moment. It's called High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard. He's one of the most famous coaches worldwide. And I love his book. It's so motivating. I read it in the morning after my cup of morning tea and after a short meditation. He talks about the soul and the very specific mission of each of us on this planet. And he talks about long-lasting success methods. Actually, everything he is talking about is highlighted in different text marker colors. There are so many interesting and life changing quotes. Some of them are on sticky notes right in front of me. Sokrates may have said this for example: "Human excellence is a start of mind."

Well, another quote I've read in the early past is that: "The purpose of life isn't happiness. The purpose of life is rather experience and growth. Happiness comes as a natural byproduct." I maybe once pointed this one out in another post but we all know the depth of repetition. This is the reason why there are so many visual reminders in my flat. I even post sticky notes on my mirror in the bathroom to remind myself of the badass I am. Something like "you are beautiful right now" or "you are perfectly enough just the way you are". Sounds funny? Well, first I was uncertain about this but then I tried. To see myself talking to me in the mirror every morning or when I sit at my desk rereading all these amazing quotes - something happens. My brain is just a big big system which is interested in my patterns. And this is what the mind is all about. Patterns. So when you are able to just be open enough to try something new you will be surprised how fast things are about to fall into place.

I've always been interested in writing my thoughts down and reread them later on. I do this for more than 20 years now. And as you already know I am doing it online already for three years. Three years of experience sharing with the world. Three amazing and mind blowing years of chaos and synchronicity. Three amazing life altering years. Now I feel like I am getting calmer and smoother. My hesitation for the perfect life gets easier. Thriving for perfection was always a topic in my life. But the only person who was suffering from this was no one else than me. It had to stop. I wanted it to stop so badly but I was addicted. I was addicted to the imagination of a perfect life. Of finding someone out there who matches my kind of perfection and takes me away on his white horse to the small castle behind the hills. This prince won't come. Nobody is gonna save your ass. You can ask people for support and help but you still have to walk the path on your own.

We can help each other heal. We can press the button to have a fresh start. We can change our perception in a few weeks. We can take the time in the morning to write down half a page about what we are grateful for. It just takes enough motivation and dedication to stick to it. Make it a habit. The power of your life lays in the magic of your habits. Nobody can change their whole life in one night. As you might already know the Universe itself was not made in one night. It took billions of billions of light years to make this blue planet a home for all of us. We share this home. We are all one. We might think that we are separated from each other but this merely comes from the disconnection with ourselves and nature. Lately I watched a movie called "the secret life of the trees". It was a German documentary about a man who was almost looking like my father. He published many many books about trees and their interconnection with each other. How they communicate. How long it takes them to communicate. How beautiful they care for each other. I love trees. Always loved them. But since I watched this movie I am even more in love with trees. 

I am happy I took a break from all this chaos outside. I am happy that I am still not afraid to come back even though I am becoming more and more sensible. I am becoming for sensible for the content that is produced out there. My filter is love. I want to spread love all over the place. I want to love as many humans as possible. I want to gather in beautiful communities and share my heart. As I do. I am still dreaming of Ibiza. I am still dreaming of living in a van and traveling the world. I am still dreaming of getting half of my body inked. I am still dreaming of having children with a beloved husband one day. I am still dreaming of becoming self-employed and start my own business. I am still dreaming of having girlfriends who are preparing me for my bachelorette party. I am still dreaming of watching the stars somewhere out there on the back of a car. I am still dreaming of been sun kissed everyday and appreciate life in its most natural way. I am still dreaming. And that's beautiful. No one can take this away from me. And nobody will ever try. 

Dream on. Dream big. Plan things. Be prepared to do it differently. Be open to the gifts of the Universe. Be there for existence to surprise you. Be there for yourself. Be there for healing. Healing is ultimately connected to others. You cannot avoid life by sitting alone at home in solitude. Life is happening out of your comfort zone. Leave your comfort zone and get excited about all the miracles happening out there. Share your heart. Share your dream. Live in the moment. Give something back to nature. Stay true to yourself. Love yourself a little more today. You'll be okay. I promise. Because you survived until this very day. We are strong together. We are united. Guided. Beloved. Trust. Trust more. Trust with love. 


I love you to the moon and back!